#i'm a little self conscious about my prose in a way i'm not about comics

[starflungwaddledee]

wait, you have kirby fanfics?! where can i find them??

aaahh none of them are public, so there's nowhere to find them sorry!

they are more like random scenes or explorations or one-shots written out of order than anything start-to-finish that i could ever post.

but that is one of the reasons i have such clear and thorough answers for questions about awtdy or characterisation/headcanons in particular. i've spent a long time with the story and characters and there's over 150k words in the document my gf and i share 😅

it might not be start-to-finish but it is fundamentally "complete" as a narrative. that's also one of the reasons i don't take suggestions for plot points or anything like that; the plot is already scripted. we already know how everything goes! i do love seeing when folks theorize about it though!

a lot of the comics i draw are 1:1 scenes from the writing, so you're still kinda seeing it? maybe i'll release some tiny little snippets one day, but i'll probably never post any of it in full

[blueberry-lemon]

My 2022

I see a lot of people writing posts or threads about things they did in 2022. I don't usually do this sort of thing for a few reasons. One is that I'm aware that it can be a bit pretentious and a bit frustrating for others to read if they had a really bad year. For that reason, consider this a soft content warning for "yet another post reflecting on 2022." The other reason is that I don't think I've accomplished anything worth reflecting about, and am quite disappointed in myself and my 2022!

But...maybe that self-conscious feeling is exactly why I should force myself to write this.

A few things I accomplished in 2022:

I wrote some stuff

I put up the final chapter of my Sonic fanfic [although not the epilogue yet, sorry readers!] titled "Have You Heard From Sonic Lately?" Of all things I did this year, this is probably one of the things I'm most proud of? I think I'm decent at writing these characters and I like playing in this world in a mostly-canonical way, following guidelines painted by the games, the IDW comics, and ironically now Sonic Prime.

I put up Chapter 1 and Chapter 2 of Soul Symphony: Abandoned Encore. SS:AE is prose sequel story to my 2010-2015 webcomic Soul Symphony. These characters and this story mean a lot to me, but I left them behind as relics as 2015. I decided that the year of my 10-year high school reunion would be a fitting time to look back on these characters.

Side note: The comments I receive on Ao3 are so nice??? They're so heartwarming, they make my day. Something about someone enjoying my writing is 100x more satisfying than someone enjoying a drawing I did, and the way people express their feedback is really meaningful. I wanna cry every time. Thank you to everyone who has read my stuff.

I put out two meaty pieces: a review of Cam Marshall's comic "Matchmaker", and my year-end reflection titled "I Forgot How To Climb The Mountain."

I've wrote a few mini blog posts scattered across Cohost, Tumblr, and Patreon, which you can find in the #blogofkylelab tag.

Behind the scenes, I've continued my work as a Writer working on Rhythm Doctor as part of 7th Beat Games.

Art and Game Dev

I...barely drew anything, so that was kind of a disappointment. But the few things I did draw I mostly liked! The very little time/energy I have for drawing these past few years is always a tough pill to swallow, but I'm glad that when I DO make time for it, it is still pretty fun.

I've continued working on Rhythm Doctor and A Dance of Fire and Ice as a part of 7th Beat Games. We put out some cool collab levels.

I helped launch ADOFAI's paid DLC expansion, Neo Cosmos! Directed by TaroNuke, it's a really cool expansion with its own identity and I love the new mechanics and focus on character/narrative.

I worked on Squeak N' Seek, a short gamejam project we made as a birthday present for Giacomo, the Lead Programmer at 7th Beat Games.

Other Stuff

I've been running @IndieGamesOfCohost for a few months now! Shares of indie game posts on Cohost, posts spotlighting new releases of lesser-known titles, and a series of Indie Interviews with fellow gamedevs. This has been very satisfying for me, and I hope I can keep the momentum going in 2023.

I'm forcing myself to write these things down to convince myself that I accomplished something, because for the past few years I haven't been able to shake the feeling that "I haven't accomplished anything." I miss the days where I drew quite often, especially between 2015 and 2018, and I made illustrations that I still cherish to this day. I feel like a "shell" of my younger self still, which is a ridiculous thing to say. Someday, I'll find my way back to a place where I'm satisfied with my output.

I hope your 2022 was bearable! Let's all work together in the new year.

[24hour-blues]

all the ones you haven't answered yet? i'm sorry you're sad💙

thank you, that's very sweet. i hope you're doing alright ���

1. when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? - more milk. i always end up putting too much.

2. do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? - yes

3. what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? - library receipts, post-its, junk mail, pencils

5. are you self-conscious of your smile? - i think it’s one of the few things i’m not self-conscious about, actually. i like my smile.

8. what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? - writing, often poetry but sometimes prose. i like creating playlists, too, and singing.

9. do you like singing/humming to yourself? - yeah, i sing to myself all the time. whatever song i have stuck in my head at the moment.

10. do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? - side, but very occasionally my stomach.

12. what’s your favorite planet? - jupiter

14. if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? - lots of pillows and blankets of all types. succulents and cacti on the windowsills. wooden utensils and dark cabinets in the kitchen. a breakfast bar with stools that don’t match. rugs with funky patterns. a big, soft couch in a bright color that you can sink into. a small balcony with fold-out chairs. rows of mugs and barely any plates. the bathroom crowded with makeup and skin products, writing on the mirror in blue marker. beds never made. a guitar in the corner of the sitting room.

15. go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! - there are more trees on earth than stars in the milky way

16. what’s your favorite pasta dish? - angel hair pasta with puttanesca sauce

18. tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. - i can’t think of anything...

19. do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? - everything. sometimes it’s big things, sometimes small. my fears and what i’m in love with. regrets. shame. hope.

20. what’s your favorite eye color? - grey

21. talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. - idk if it’s really my favorite, but my current backpack took me all through college and it’s good for storing stuff or using as an overnight bag. it’s from timberland and is a nice earthy brown with a flap over the top. lots of pockets.

22. are you a morning person? - i can be

23. what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? - make breakfast and tea. read or watch a movie that makes me rethink everything

25. what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? - a school, i think?

26. what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? - i haven’t had them forever, but i wear my doc martens with everything. i used to wear plain white keds with everything.

27. what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? - winter green

28. sunrise or sunset? - sunrise

30. think of it: have you ever been truly scared? - yes

31. what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. - i like soft, fluffy socks and ones with fun patterns. i love hiking socks. i don’t wear them to sleep tho.

32. tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. - i went to a waffle house at 5am with a friend and some friends of hers i’d just met on her birthday. we were all really drunk, the food took forever, and it tasted awful, but we were happy and laughing.

33. what’s your fave pastry? - probably a cinnamon roll

35. do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? - i like a good calligraphy pen and new notebooks. i don’t use them often; i feel like i don’t have anything important enough to write.

37. do you like keeping your room messy or clean? - it’s usually clean unless i’m not feeling well. sometimes i get disorganized.

38. tell us about your pet peeves! - overlapping conversations. people interrupting others. loud mouth noises, like chewing or licking. people criticizing my driving. nitpicky comments on my clothes or how i look. being talked about.

39. what color do you wear the most? - black, probably.

41. what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? - how it feels to float by helena fox

42. do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! - nope

43. who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? - i’m not sure

44. when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? - i can’t remember

45. do you trust your instincts a lot? - not really

46. tell us the worst pun you can think of. - i can’t remember it but something about pigeons and being coo-l

47. what food do you think should be banned from the universe? - bacon. i just wanna make people angry.

48. what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? - my dad told me a story once, about when i was a kid. he said that he and i were walking together near the lake in the neighborhood across from mine. i was holding his hand, and i said to him that this was the happiest time in my life because i wouldn't be the same when i grew out of being a child. i think i have the same fear now--that i'll never be that happy again.

49 do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

- i like records but i only have one. it's an album by ccr. i really like them

50. what’s an odd thing you collect?

- beer bottle caps

52. what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

- maybe those "girl..." text posts that just say stupid shit

53. have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

- watched them all but pulp fiction. i don't really remember heathers at all

55. what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

- lets not talk about that

57. go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

- not in the mood sorry

58. who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? - bri is wine mom. quincy and i are vodka aunt.

60. do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

- yes but i rarely remember favorites. i read so much and feel it then forget all the words

61. what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

- someone gave me a rock once. i get too nervous to give stupid gifts

62. do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

- orange or cranberry

63. are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

- i'm more fussy about music than books, but i do like my books organized. i like them worn in and well-read tho, not in perfect shape.

64. what color is the sky where you are right now?

- a fuzzy, light blue-grey. it's snowing

65. is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

- a few

66. what would your ideal flower crown look like?

- lots of green leaves in all different shapes and sizes. tiny white and blue flowers.

67. how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

- isolated and insignificant. safe

68. what’s winter like where you live?

- cold, grey, snowy.

69. what are your favorite board games?

- idk if i really too many board games. maybe cranium. i like puzzles more

71. what’s your favorite kind of tea?

- honey vanilla chamomile

72. are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

- yea and even then i forget.

73. what are some of your worst habits?

- i give up too easily

74. describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

- excitable. emotional. so very smart. creative as all hell. self-conscious where they shouldn't be. never runs out of words in the best way. loves to share.

75. tell us about your pets!

- my dog shiver is turning into a little old man, but he still acts like a puppy. he likes attention and whines to communicate. he'll greet you at the door and put his front paws on your thighs to say hi. follows you all around the house. loves to cuddle.

- my pigeon spirit is young and vocal. she coos for attention. when i go to sleep, she grunts every time i move to ask where i am and if i'm okay. i take showers with her and sit on the tile; she puffs up right into my side and sticks her wings out for me to splash water on her. she likes to be close to me to get neck scritches and push her head into my neck and preen every bit of me she can.

76. is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

- a lot probably

77. pink or yellow lemonade?

- limeade

78. are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

- i dunno they're cute

80. what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

- it's white wallpaper with pink roses along the top and ribbons of pink and green striped vertically. my mom chose it before i was born.

81. describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

- they sort of remind me of dark water where everything is reflected back in it--not just the sky but the trees and people walking--and they make you want to look closer because you know there's something in there, it's not just a reflection, like flat glass. but it's hidden until you dio your hand in the pictures broken.

82. are/were you good in school?

- pretty good

83. what’s some of your favorite album art?

- i don't look at albums

85. do you read comics? what are your faves?

- not really, but watchmen is one of my favorites.

86. do you like concept albums? which ones?

- dunno

88. are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

- um. idrk. i like whatever monet was doing.

91. where do you plan on traveling this year?

- maybe michigan

92. are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

- i like cheese

93. what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

- i just kind of. let it do whatever.

94. who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

- my uncle

95. what are your plans for this weekend?

- honestly have no clue

96. do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

- put them off until windows tells me it's restarting the computer in five minutes

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

- mb

98. when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

- in college with jacob, although i wouldn't really call it joking. we just walked through a state park. it was beautiful.

100. if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

- idk. i feel like i'd make the same mistakes if i went back, but the future scares me.